Nglish research paper talking about Video games and children”

This should be an inquiry based English research paper. We were assigned to write something that could contribute to society in any means. I have written 7 pages but it is not yet completed. I would like you to edit and make connections between the sources that I have wrote and also add sources from the attachments. Also I would like you to add conclusion and find what I could add to these findings. br /
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This is a feedback form my English instructor First, you need to change the notion that you will Presenteffects of video games. Academic inquiry does not merely Presentanything EVER, it engages in analysis, critique, questioning, and so on. You need to use the richer verbs, and avoid the idea of merely presenting information. The whole purpose of this class is to teach you to do writing that does MORE than present information.br /
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Second, focusing on positives and negatives is a reciple for failing. Re-read the pages on critical inquiry from the packet, which you can find on D2L in the assignment sequence. The pages about critical inquiry explain the “3 Key Questionsfor whom? to what extent? in what contexts? So the question isis a given Effectof video games negative for whom? In what specific contexts is it truly negative? To what extent is it really negative? br /
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This mindset of presenting and pro/con has already lead you to write what would be a failing draft. You start by describing the educational use of video games, and then move onto describing the relationship between games and violence. There is no connection between the twono analysis between the two, no discussion of which aspects of video games that make them useful for education ALSO make the violence issue more severe, no discussion of how ideas from one text help us understand the findings in another. br /
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You cannot merely Presentpros and cons of video games and pass this class. You will fail. You must instead use these sources to investigate HOW videos affect the minduse the educational study not simply to say It can be used for educationbut to figure out HOW video games impact people in such a way that they are good for educationand how those features of video games ALSO help explain the violence issue. Ask WHY, and HOW DOES IT WORK? You cant just list pros and cons. This is what you need to work on revising for your next draftand you must finish this. This was meant to be a FINISHED 8 page draft, and you have not submitted a finished essay, but rather only a part of one.”