Ow effectively international training improves the firelightersa performance in Saudi Aramco comapny

Hi,
The below are the comments from tutor on my proposal dissertation (abstract and survey). I need from you to revise the proposal dissertation (abstract and survey) based on the received below comments from my tutor, then write the final dissertation report ( 15,000 words)

Comments from Tutor:

Ability to construct a project with clear, coherent and well defended research questions/ objectives:
Evaluating the effectiveness of training could provide a good dissertation. However the phrasing in the questions here seem closer to a piece of organisationally specific post course evaluation than a piece of academic research

Discussion of the relation between your proposed research and previous research
Again I dont think you understand the purpose of this section. This is not purely about organisational context but should discuss the theoretical and conceptual literature which will inform your study. So if your study is about the evaluation of training programmes, then what existing research about such evaluations can help you guide and shape your empirical research?

Discussion and justification of proposed methods
There is confusion about the status of empirical research that you discuss in this section. In essence it is ambiguous whether it is primary research or secondary data. If you dont understand the distinction between these two concepts than you need to revisit the dissertation support material.

Overall Comments:
What you appear to be doing here is offering a previously conducted organisational survey as the content of your dissertation. If this is a proposal for research study conducted, then why do you already know the results? For example, you say a? The results showed that the Fire Chiefs are satisfied and have no major complaints with training delivery, training coordination, or physical fitness services delivered by FT&DS. They believe that the training and services provided have had a very positive effect on the performance of their personnel.a? Isnat this what the research is meant to find out?

I think you need to clarify the status of the organisational survey that you are referring to. If it has already been conducted, then for the purposes of your dissertation, it represents secondary data. The question then becomes what additional analysis your dissertation research can bring this data to add data. Alternatively a further piece of primary research could be proposed to follow up the issues identified through the secondary data. What you cant do it simply retrofit some existing piece of research and the label it as conducted for your dissertation.

This is a proposal. You are proposing to carry out some research not reporting research that has been already completed. This is something that needs clarification.

Abstract and Survey.

Title (max. 15 words)
How effectively international training improves the firelightersa performance in Saudi Aramco comany

Abstract (max. 200 words)

The problem is that the Fire Training and Development Section (FT&DS) has been delivering training and training-related services to FrPD personnel for over five (5) years and has not evaluated the impact of this provision of training and training-related services. The purpose of this research is to assess the impact of courses from FT&DS on FrPD operations and to evaluate the overall service provided by the FT&DS.
The research questions were:

1. Do courses delivered by FT&DS adequately prepare FrPD personnel to operate in the field?
2. Do services provided by Training Coordination make it easy to use FT&DS services?
3. Does the Physical Fitness Program have a positive benefit?
4. How can FT&DS improve its service?
The results showed that the Fire Chiefs are satisfied and have no major complaints with training delivery, training coordination, or physical fitness services delivered by FT&DS. They believe that the training and services provided have had a very positive effect on the performance of their personnel.
The primary recommendation resulting from the research is to conduct unannounced drill observations at the Fire Control Units to verify the reported positive changes in knowledge and skills. Secondary recommendations include: (1) Identify, develop and implement training courses specifically directed at Fire Chiefs. (2) Evaluate the curricula to ensure it meets the 60:40 ratio of psychomotor to cognitive learning and amend the curricula where it does not.

Introduction (approx. 200 words)

The problem is that the Fire Training and Development Section (FT&DS) has been delivering training and training-related services to FrPD personnel for over five (5) years and has not evaluated the impact of this provision of training and training-related services. The purpose of this research is to assess the impact of courses from Training and Development on FrPD operations and to evaluate the overall service provided by the FT&DS.
The research questions are:

1. Do courses delivered by FT&DS adequately prepare FrPD personnel to operate in the field?
2. Do services provided by Training Coordination make it easy to use FT&DS services?
3. Does the Physical Fitness Program have a positive benefit?
4. How can FT&DS improve its service?
This information is useful to FT&DS in determining if training goals are being met, and if training resources are deployed to their best advantage. Information derived from this research will be applied such that improvements are facilitated.

Relation to previous research (approx. 400 words)
Most oil companies do not use a a?fire departmenta? approach to protecting their facilities. They have a small cadre of full-time fire protection professionals that are supported by other company employees that hold regular jobs such as plant operators and maintenance. These other employees are called when there is a fire or other emergency. The resources devoted to training are therefore small. Most oil companies use vendor developed and delivered training for their personnel. Additionally, most oil companies do not operate large or complex training facilities. Typically, each facility identifies its training needs and contracts with a vendor to supply it. Training and organization for fire protection in general uses a decentralized approach where each facility acts independent of the others.
The Saudi Aramco Fire Protection Department (FrPD) is organized more like a very large municipal or governmental fire department. It has 1400 full-time staff which includes firefighters and other allied fire protection specialists. It has a large dedicated training staff and operates two full-time fire training centers that are capable of providing a wide array of training including large-scale live fire drills, rescue simulators and hazardous materials training areas. The training and equipment used by FrPD is standardized across the entire organization. The reasons for the approach used by FrPD are as follows:

1. FrPD protects a vast infrastructure of communities, industrial areas, air strips, ships and docks, pipelines and offshore facilities.
2. FrPD provides protection across a huge geographical area spanning across most of the Arabian Peninsula.
3. Training resources are scarce in the Middle East.
4. Saudi Aramco is able to fund this level of protection.
Given the wide array of assets it must protect and the environment it must operate within, FrPD has elected to develop its own training programs. These programs are geared specifically toward preparing personnel to provide fire protection for all assets in the Kingdom and are based on international standards. Evaluation instruments for most courses are accredited by an independent third-party. FrPD operates the largest fire department of any single oil company in the world and is probably alone in developing and delivering curriculum specifically for its personnel and furthermore, providing third-party accreditation.
This self-sufficiency requires FrPD to periodic